SITURPS


are not a form of exercise leading to belching, but is in fact the acronym for Silly Internet Toy Universal Role Playing Game! (he changes plural like a rally driver in a chicane!).



Step One: Character generation! Go to http://www.rain-street.org/fightcrime.htm This will generate two PCs, one male and one female. Pick one (optionally, two players generate their PC at the same time.) Your motivation is that you fight crime.
He's an otherworldly voodoo werewolf searching for his wife's true killer. She's a psychotic insomniac snake charmer with a knack for trouble. They fight crime!



Step Two: Name That Character! Go to http://title.flywheel.org/ and generate a name and a title.
He is Lieutenant of Yngwie Farking Malmsteen, C. Stephen Wheelwright. She is Minor Shah Junior Grade of Invincible Sand Castles, Snoop Doggy B. Heddy Clapton II



Step Three: The Plot Thickener Go to http://www.lifeformz.com/idea/idea.cgi and generate the plot.
A brilliant gang member, a juggler, and a young tight-rope walker wage war against each other.



Step Four: The System Declare what you want your PC to do, and roll a die. On a 1-4, you fail. Otherwise you suceed. You can, however, automatically suceed at an action if you somehow use one of your descriptive words. If a descriptive word is used, mark it off, it can't be used again. I'd say "it can't be used again this session", but you're not going to play this more than once, are you?

"Hell, Snoop Doggy B, he's juggling snakes at us! The ravenous man-eating cobras of the Andes!"

"Don't worry! I'm a snake charmer!"

"So?"

"So I can charm the farking flying snakes, dumbass."

"You can't charm a snake when it's flying at you having just been thrown by a psychotic juggler who's waging war on a young tight-rope walker and the brilliant gang member who may just be my wife's true killer!"

"I so can!"

"what, the snake's going to pause in mid air while you blow your flute at it?"

"At least I have a real title! Who the hell is Yngwie Malmsteen anyway?"

"That's Yngwie Farking Malmsteen to you, boyo."

"Whiner."

"Mook."

"I hate these stupid contrived examples of play."

"Me too. Why do we do them? Is it the futile hope of lending some substance to a game which is really little more than a pathetically simple mechanic wrapped in a joke? A quixotic attempt to impose a sense of meaning onto a chaotic and impersonal universe? Why? Why are we here?"

"Let's just say I....hate crime."