8/7/03

Random story recently read - a novella called "The Zombies of Madison County," by Douglas E. Winter, inside The Mammoth Book of Best New Horror: Volume Nine, ed by Stephen Jones. It's a really nifty, gruesome story and zombie fans *HAVE* to know it. Take Bridges of Madison County, and add shambling undead.

Loopy amount of rains started last night at 8pm or so, until well in the evening. I had a delightful night, and had nice dreams, to boot. My waking mood was nothing short of cheerful. Had a grand breakfast of raspberry toaster strudel and Newt nuzzles, and happy gabbies.

Classic Plastic Army Men, complete with battle tactics. I still wish I could find the Star Trek ones again. Speaking of the things that come up when you search for army men....Worst "action figure set" I've seen yet. Not safe for work, unless they don't mind seeing a pudding girl eaten with a spoon shaped like a hand with a phallic handle.

A bus surveillance video of the bus driver who maced herself and then told her boss she was attacked, all so she could get a day off from work. Why do people go to these extremes? Why doesn't calling up your boss and faking a cough work? I am glad that there are hidden cameras on busses, though. A good application of tech for safety.

Best spam ever - From jal@spiegel.de -

Hello,

I'm a time traveler stuck here in 2003. Upon arriving here my dimensional warp generator stopped working. I trusted a company here by the name of LLC Lasers to repair my Generation 3 52 4350A watch unit, and they fled on me. I am going to need a new DWG unit, preferably the rechargeable AMD wrist watch model with the GRC79 induction motor, four I80200 warp stabilizers, 512GB of SRAM and the menu driven GUI with front panel XID display.

I will take whatever model you have in stock, as long as its received certification for being safe on carbon based life forms.

In terms of payment:
I dont have any Galactic Credits left. Payment can be made in platinum gold or 2003 currency upon safe delivery of unit.

INSTRUCTIONS MUST BE FOLLOWED EXACTLY:
Please transport unit in either a brown paper bag or box to below coordinates on Thursday August 7th at (exactly 4:00pm) Eastern Standard Time on the dot. A few minutes prior will be ok, but it cannot be after. If you miss this timeframe please email me. I will not be there prior to 4:45pm EST, so do not transport before then.

Item is to be delivered at (out of service basketball court) located at: Latitude N 42.47935 & Longitude W 071.17355 and the Elevation is 119 feet.
WARNING: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO TRANSPORT ITEM BY REGULAR MEANS OF TELEPORTATION. THEY ARE MONITORING AND WILL REDIRECT THE SIGNAL!! I DO NOT CARE HOW YOU HAVE TO GET IT HERE, JUST DO IT IN A WAY THAT NO SPYING EYES WILL POSSIBLY BE ABLE TO REDIRECT THE TRANSFERENCE. IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU BE ABLE TO MONITOR THE TRANSFER. HOW ARE YOU GOING TO SEND IT SO THAT THEY CANNOT REDIRECT IT??? If in doubt do not transport actual unit until your method of transfer can be confirmed as a success. You just might need to send a intergalactic courier to deliver item safely to me. If so be VERY careful at how they approach me IN MY WHITE CAR.

After unit has been delivered please email me at: info@federalfundingprogram.com
with payment instructions. Do not reply directly back to this email.

Thank You

quartermaster

Well, Criminy!! Regarding Vampires Peacekeepers mission 3 - Welcome, friend, to Peacekeepers Mission 3. Very sorry, but we can't do anything for you - you need one of our more advanced missions. Ramma-frazzin.... ah well, at least I have another fresh vampire baby, IRA.

It seems to be an epidemic -

blackbird says, "anyone want to give me coins and why does it say i need a more advanced mission???"
SwEeTDReaMS reads a Scroll of Turning near you! You stumble around groggily.
Dragolis says "where is your advanced mission??"

Not to mention that I was out in the open, and got bitten 26 times! Bah!

Now For The First Time Ever You Can Have A Real Celebrity Call You Or A Friend For Just $19.95. They Can Also Deliver A Brief Customized Message Written By You For $29.95. Whether It's For A Special Occasion Or Just For The Fun It, There's No Better Way To Impress A Client, A Sweetheart Or A Friend Than To Have A Celebrity Call. So Place Your Order Today. ] Get C-list (and D-list) celebs to make personalized messages for you. I especially like the "Caps Every Letter In The Blurb" writing. I'm tempted to have Peter Jurasik leave a wise-ass Londo message on Kev's voicemail.

Okie.. enough goofing off... time for the afternoon stretches and scaldo-shower.

a year ago - Earth and Beyond Playtest, Kev & Bailey, fat parrots, french fry girl

2 years ago - harried, inculpate, plane lands just down the road on andrews as a makeshift runway and kits my regular bus, wondering about lj's image server (still not ready!), happy thoughts, magic can of soda

3 years ago - grumping, Space cowboys shows old man butts.